Not Quite Mister Cellophane

I wonder sometimes how much my kids really miss me when I’m not around.

R has gotten to that annoying age where he’s definitely Mommy’s boy, and… well, let’s say he’s fairly verbal about it.  He’s made it clear that he’s Mommy’s and the Monster’s friend, and not my friend.  Hurtful, but he’s four.

The Monster, on the other hand…

So, I’m gone this weekend to a bonspiel in Toronto.  On Thursday, before I left, I handled all the usual morning chores, and we’ve been talking to both boys about how I’d be gone for a few days.  Thursday evening was an outing to an event at R’s preschool, with Grandma and Grandpa helping out with chaperoning duties, and there’d be fun through the weekend, until I get home Sunday night.

Thursday evening, after I’d arrived at my lodging in Toronto, my computer started ringing – Facetime from the wife.  Apparently, out of the blue, the Monster started getting upset and calling for me while they were at the preschool event, and the easiest solution – knowing that I’d arrived safely – was to get me on the screen so that he could see me.  Whether seeing himself (the Monster likes the camera and making funny faces to it) or seeing me helped, he seemed to calm down for a bit, but…

I’ll admit that I’m left with a question of whether he really misses me, or if he misses the routine of me.  I’m the one who usually puts him to bed, because I have the strength to move him around if he’s being difficult and the patience to deal with him when he’s getting into a mood.  He is the kind of child who likes his rituals and regularity.  On the other hand, I know he’s getting more and more aware of when things happen, and when things are different and why, and it might have occurred to him that I should be there and wasn’t, despite it being a different circumstance.

Might be a good question for us to ask the school psychologist when we see them for the IEP meeting in 2 weeks’ time.

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